


Silver Lining

by waywardmoeyy



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Castiel x Reader Fluff, Castiel x Reader angst, F/M, castiel x reader - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-21
Updated: 2018-11-21
Packaged: 2019-08-27 00:54:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,070
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16692274
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/waywardmoeyy/pseuds/waywardmoeyy
Summary: This fic is based on the song "Trying Not to Love You" by Nickelback.





	Silver Lining

Cas stared at the wall before him. He hadn’t moved in over 6 hours, making Sam and Dean more than concerned. They tried to get him to move, to respond to something, but nothing worked. He was stuck in his head…  
You called to me and I fall at your feet.  
He remembered his words as he pleaded for you to stay, to still love him. He didn’t understand what changed in you. For months, the two of you had been inseparable, happy.  
But that day, just over a week ago, you came to him and told him it was over. You had tears in your eyes, unable to look at him as you said that you couldn’t be around him anymore.  
And that was the beginning of the end for him.  
Was it something I did? Was there somebody else?  
He couldn’t understand why you would walk away so suddenly with no explanation. But, that’s exactly what happened that night. His jaw clenched as he remembered how he fell to his knees, refusing to let go of your hand as you struggled to pull away.  
But you eventually broke free, and that was the last contact he had with you. For days, he had tried to find a hint of sense behind it, but found nothing.  
So, the next step was to move on, and forget you.  
But, that was nearly impossible. His red, swollen eyes fluttered shut as more tears streamed down his cheeks.  
Trying not to love you only makes me love you more.  
Angels are dangerous.  
Growing up, that’s what you had always been taught. They weren’t the same beings kids were taught about in Sunday school. They were warriors, soldiers programmed out take out anything that threatened Heaven. Sure, they were also there to protect mankind… in theory.  
But in reality, they were servants of God. And God was nowhere to be found. So now, the angels were soldiers without a commander.  
And that was definitely dangerous.  
But there was something different about Castiel. Sure, he claimed to be a warrior for God, protector of mankind, but he was also a firm believer in free will. That alone should have made him the most dangerous angel in existence…  
But you didn’t care. You lost yourself in those deep blue eyes and that raspy voice. His rebellious nature made you want him more. And he wanted everything to do with you.  
You loved him.  
That put you in an incredible amount of danger. Castiel was hated by so many angels, the very beings you had been warned about your entire life. Getting too involved with him would bring the wrath of them down upon you.  
So, when you found yourself growing closer to the ancient being, you forced yourself to shut it all down, which broke you in a million ways.  
You let out a deep sigh as you stared up at the ceiling. Your mind raced as your stomach sank. What if there was a way?  
No.  
You closed your eyes as you whispered into the frigid air, “this kind of pain, only time takes away.” You repeated the words as you tried to glue your heart back together with lies.  
You had never felt this kind of pain before. Not when you lost your mother to hellhounds, or when you were forced to leave your little brother with your aunt in order to seek out revenge.  
This was a different kind of pain; this cracked your very soul. Deep down, you knew it would take a lifetime to heal from losing someone you had loved that much. But, you had to do what you needed to survive.  
You sat up in bed and held your face in your hands. Your flushed cheeks were sticky from your salty tears. “Trying not to need you is tearing me apart,” you whispered into the stale air of your motel room.  
Your eyes shot up at you heard a familiar sound come from the foot of the bed. You began to shake as you fixed your gaze on the khaki trench coat, slowly moving your eyes up. “Castiel,” you gasped in awe as the angel stared back at you. His eyes were bloodshot; he had been crying. Your chest tightened at the thought of him crying because of you. You shook your head before glancing back up at him. “What are you doing here?”  
Cas didn’t say a word as he slowly approached your side of the bed, taking a seat right in front of you. His solemn gaze remained fixed on yours. “Y/N, Trying not to love you only went so far. I can’t take it anymore.” His words were desperate, shattering what little was left of your heart. “Please, Y/N. I love you so much. If we just keep on trying, we could be much more.”  
You shook your head as more tears escaped your stinging eyes. “Cas, when I’m around you, I’m in danger.”  
Cas nodded. “Yes, but you are happy too, aren’t you? I promised that I would protect you, whatever that took. Why do you not trust me?”  
“Castiel,” you choked. You cleared your throat. “This has nothing to do with trust. Angels are dangerous, especially the ones after you, and being around you puts me in their line of sight. You’re Heaven’s Most Wanted, which makes me an accessory every moment I’m around you.”  
Cas bit his lip as he turned away. “Sometimes love means putting that kind of thing aside for the sake of being happy.”  
That was something you couldn’t argue with. You really did love him. And maybe that wasn’t as much of a problem as you thought it was.  
Cas grazed your cheek with his hand. “Y/N, please just give this a chance.” His voice cracked as he fought back more tears.  
You let out a shuddered sigh as you leaned into his touch. The blue of his eyes calmed you as you drowned the part of you that fought this. He was right.  
You slowly nodded as you closed your eyes, tears continuing to fall. To Hell with Heaven and its minions. You needed Cas, and he needed you.  
After a few moments later, you opened your eyes, gasping as Cas’s lips gently captured yours. His shaky hand cupped your face as you leaned into him, allowing your heart to slowly mold back together.


End file.
